Shhhhhhh
It wasn’t the first time they’d sought shelter. Katie and Michael shivered, listening to things hitting the floor above.
“It won’t be much longer, Katie. We’ll be safe again soon.”
Then? It was too quiet.
“Michael?”
“Michael?”
“MICHAEL!”
———————————————————————
Trifextra’s weekend challenge: Complete the following story in 33 words:
‘It wasn’t the first time.’
(The five words are not to be included in your 33 words)
Posted: June 1st, 2012 under Moose Nuggets, trifecta, words.
Comments: 17
Comments
Comment from justkeepinitrealfolks
Time: June 2, 2012, 6:27 am
Very spellbinding.
Comment from Jennifer Worrell
Time: June 2, 2012, 7:26 am
SCARY! Well-done!
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Comment from FKC
Time: June 2, 2012, 8:18 am
Since when have I been other people, missy??
P.S. Why my linky no clicky?
Comment from Imelda
Time: June 2, 2012, 8:40 am
oh! I am sad for both of them. I can feel Katie’s fear and loss. Very nicely done.
~Imelda
Comment from Ruby Manchanda
Time: June 2, 2012, 9:22 am
Stunner.
Comment from Mel
Time: June 2, 2012, 12:38 pm
Oh my goodness, that made my stomach drop. What a horrifying event you captured in 33 words. Well done, as usual.
Comment from sandra Tyler
Time: June 2, 2012, 1:24 pm
Gosh, there are a lot of cliff hangers this week!
Comment from Tara R.
Time: June 2, 2012, 1:48 pm
This made me jump.
Comment from Lance
Time: June 2, 2012, 4:52 pm
Repeating his name while the horror happens off screen. Excellent.
This is just outstanding
Comment from brenda w
Time: June 2, 2012, 5:43 pm
Eerie and intense.
Comment from JannaT
Time: June 2, 2012, 8:54 pm
You conveyed her growing fear/panic well.
Comment from OldDogNewTits
Time: June 2, 2012, 10:47 pm
I assume he went off to get a snack?
Comment from Libby
Time: June 3, 2012, 5:10 pm
Makes me want to read more…
Comment from Lilian
Time: June 4, 2012, 6:58 am
Nice one! Quite effective.
Comment from Trifecta
Time: June 5, 2012, 6:21 am
Sorry for the late comment here. I really enjoyed this. I love reading your posts each challenge, because I’m never sure what I’m going to get. Your writing runs the gamut from sentimental family moments to. . .well. . .this. I love it. Thanks for joining us.
Comment from FKC
Time: June 1, 2012, 11:41 pm
This is really excellent and I think the only entry I have read that is not “romantic” in nature. Really evokes the holocaust for me. That’s a powerful 33 words.